That's "Campana-stan" or ''Land of Campana." It reflects the Weltanschauung of Michael E. Campana, President-for-Life of the Republic of Campanastan. Welcome to Campanastan - no passports or visas required!
Thirsty in Suburbia Gayle Leonard documents things from the world of water that make us smile: particularly funny, amusing and weird items on bottled water, water towers, water marketing, recycling, the art-water nexus and working.
WaSH Resources New publications, web sites and multi-media on water, sanitation and hygiene (WaSH).
Water 50/50 From Jay Famiglietti at UC-Irvine. Fifty lectures in fifty weeks: The 2012 Birdsall-Dreiss Distinguished Lectureship. A global lecture tour delivering the message about our changing water cycle, groundwater depletion, and the future of freshwater availability.
Water For The Ages Abby, another PNWer, writes about global water issues with passion and concern.
The Campanastan Ministry of Information has decided to add a translation feature to the state's official blog. So you can now read these important posts in your favorite language. The Ministry has added a Google translator at the top of the left blogroll.
Unfortunately, you must know enough English to know what "translation" means.
"Čovekãt e tolkova pãti čovek, kolkoto ezika znae." -- Bulgarian proverb (transliterated): "The more languages you know, the more you are a person."
Late last year I discovered Peaceful Valley Donkey Rescue, a charitable organization based in California with a facility in Virgina and one under development in Texas.
PVDR's latest solicitation focuses on the 'quaint' Texas practice of donkey team roping, which is supposed to be illegal in Texas. PVDR is seeking to establish a permanent facility in Texas to provide a refuge (Texas Burro Rescue) for the many abandoned and abused donkeys needing shelter and a kind hand.
The airline’s policy — posted on United's Web site — states that if a passenger cannot fit into a single seat, buckle their seatbelt with an additional seatbelt extension, or put the seat’s armrest down, the airline will ask that passenger to pay for an extra seat or stay behind.
Spokesperson Robin Urbanski Janikowski, meanwhile, said the airline will first attempt to take measures to avoid the extra charge. “If there is another seat on the airplane that is next to an empty seat, we will re-accommodate our guest in that seat and there is no charge,” she wrote in an e-mail message.
Gotta go hit the treadmill.
“Is Elizabeth Taylor fat? Her favorite food is seconds.”-- Joan Rivers
Rock music impresario (seems he's always described that way) Phil Spector was found guilty of second-degree murder in the 2003 death of actress Lana Clarkson. The first trial in 2007 produced a hung jury.
Looks like Psycho Phil will be swapping his Wall of Sound for a Wall of Concrete. Here is his mug shot after conviction.
So sad - such a brilliant record producer and a pretty good songwriter.
"He's a rebel and he'll never ever be any good. He's a rebel and he'll never ever be understood." --He's A Rebel by The Crystals (produced by Phil Spector and written by Gene Pitney)
Firing missiles across Japan. Threatening to detonate a nuclear bomb. Angrily engaging in saber-rattling.
Yep, those North Koreans are just downright cranky, and the crankiest of all is Dear Leader Kim Jong Il. And if the leader's cranky, so is the country.
Some suspect that Kim is so cranky because he can never be President. The North Koreans took care of that when they named his late father, Kim Il Sung, President-for-Eternity. I don't think they thought that move through (or perhaps they did).
But are the North Koreans really such bad people?
No, the North Koreans are just terribly misunderstood. They are not warmongers, nor are they anti-social. The reason they keep to themselves and are so cranky and belligerent is simple: their men are terribly self-conscious and possessed of low self-esteem because they have really bad haircuts. Yes, take a look at Dear Leader Kim Jong Il above. Would you go out much if you had his haircut? Wouldn't you be angry at the world?
But bad haircuts are not their fault; a few years ago it was discovered that North Koreans lack the gene that enables a person to give good men's haircuts.
You remember one of my Vienna Reports (go back and read Vienna Report 7now) in which I described my encounter with Azerbaijan's Minister of the Interior, who had a really bad haircut. Turned out that Azerbaijani barbers had been trained in North Korea.
Realizing that Mother Nature had dealt them a bad hand, the North Koreans recently asked the Japanese if they could borrow a few thousand barbers. But the Japanese are understandably reluctant to do so because the last time the North Koreans "borrowed" some Japanese, they forgot to return them for about 30 years. And when they did, they had bad haircuts!
So let's get those North Koreans some good barbers! Hey, Italy!
"The revolution is carried out by means of one's thought, not through one's family background." -- Kim Jong Il
John Fleck, science writer extraordinaire for the Albuquerque Journal, wrote this insightful article about our inability to make decisions regarding nuclear weapons [you may have to get a free pass to read this article - just two clicks].
In an April 1, 2009 New Orleans press conference, U.S. Army Corps of Engineers New Orleans District Supervisor Col. R.P. 'Pat' McGroin announced a mammoth engineering project - the world's largest - that would completely straighten, widen, and concrete-line the Mississippi River between New Orleans and Baton Rouge. The project, formally titled FART -Fix America's River Transportation - has been sought by petrochemical and shipping companies for years, whose many facilities line that reach of the river.
"Let's clear the air: FART is real, red-blooded, kick-butt, take-no-prisoners American engineering at its best," McGroin said. "It'll make Boston's Big Dig look like moving sand in a cat box. Heck, we may even find more bodies than they did! Maybe Hoffa's there!" McGroin stated that the project would "dwarf any previous engineering project" and give many Corps employees "something to do for the next 16 years."
The FART project, estimated to cost $600B and to be completed by 2025, will completely straighten, widen, and line 130 river-miles and shorten the distance between New Orleans and Baton Rouge by 35 miles. It will permit supertankers not even on the drawing boards to sail effortlessly up and down the river. These tankers will be over one kilometer long and carry up to 8 times the fluid volume than current ones.
"FART will make my job a helluva lot easier," said J.R. 'Craw' Dattie, long-time river pilot who hailed the project. "That reach of river has more curves than Britney Spears and is even more treacherous," stated Dattie.
Oil company spokesman Renata Gass was so enthusiastic that she almost soiled herself. "We have been trying to get the government to FART for years!" she said. She noted that to show their good faith, BP, Shell, ExxonMobil, and Chevron have donated $50,000 to expedite FART.
April Foolz, Director of the Obama Administration's Office of High Cost Recovery Activity Projects (OHCRAP), said that this project would also help revitalize New Orleans, still suffering from Hurricane Katrina's aftermath: "New Orleans really needs help now, and a big FART is just what the doctor ordered." Foolz went on to say that much of the work will be done by hand, so residents of New Orleans will find "semi-good" paying jobs of up to $10/hour, plus "all the cigarettes they can smoke, reduced rates on AIG health insurance, and a Merrill Lynch-backed retirement annuity."
Eileen Dover, spokeswoman for Louisiana Gov. Bobby 'Volcano' Jindal, said that "FART makes sense for Louisiana, and is better than some moronic scheme to monitor volcanoes. The Governor has been a big FART proponent for years." New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin was unavailable for comment, rumored to be ensconced on the top floor of the Hyatt Hotel. His spokeswoman, Brooke Trout, commented that the Mayor thinks "It's good to FART."
The environmental consequences of such a mammoth undertaking were addressed by the USACE district's lone environmental scientist, Hugh Jeego, who explained that an EIS had already been conducted. "The science class at Jerry Lee Lewis Middle School, under the supervision of the physical education-science teacher, Richard 'Dick' Cabeza, found no significant impact, other than the displacement of a few gators and the squashing of a few crawdads. I'm okay with that, given that economist Heywood U. Leavnow of the University of P.O. Box 2000.edu calculated a benefit-cost ratio of 600.035/1.002." When pressed by a skeptical press corps, Jeego became defensive and replied, "Listen, have you ever seen that reach of river? I mean, come on, it's not some pristine New Guinea rain forest! It's a friggin' mess! Makes New Jersey look like the Garden of Eden! So lighten up, will you?"
Frances N. Europe, the lone Sierra Club staffer in Louisiana, supported Jeego's contention. "Yeah, FART really stinks, but the Sierra Club has bigger fish to fry," she said. "Besides, have you ever seen that stretch of the river? I mean there's more crap and toxic waste there than anywhere in the world, including New Jersey. It's not some goddamn virgin rain forest in Amazonia! So, no hay problema!"
The project will also have national security implications. Department of Homeland Security spokesman Thomas "Tommie" Gunn and Department of Energy physicist Dr. Nhu Tron explained that FART will permit more efficient operation of the Strategic Petroleum Reserve. Tron gushed: "Right now, we have to haul the oil up from the oil terminal to the SPR in pickups loaded with 55-gallon drums. But with FART, we'll be able to fill up those drums much, much faster!" Gunn concurred, saying, "Because I was told to."
OHCRAP spokewoman April Foolz added that FART will not cost taxpayers "one red cent", because it will be financed by interest on the Social Security Trust Fund, and the peace dividends from the cessation of military operations in Iraq (2016), Iran (2018), Syria (2020), Pakistan (2022), and Afghanistan (2024).
Foolz said President Obama has designated former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich special overseer of the project. She acknowledged that Gov. Blagojevich had no experience in construction management, but he "knows how to handle money" and is in possession of some "really interesting pictures."
Circle of Blue Circle of Blue uses journalism, scientific research, and conversations from around the world to bring the story of the global freshwater crisis to life. Here you’ll find new water reports, news headlines, and hear from leading scientists.
Drink Water For Life The idea is simple. Drink water or other cheap beverages instead of expensive lattes, sodas, and bottled water for a set period of time. A day, a week, a month, Lent, Ramadan, Passover, or some other holiday period.
eFlowNet Newsletter From the International Union for the Conservation of Nature (IUCN) this newsletter has lots of information about environmental flows and related issues.
Sustainable Water Resources Roundtable Since 2002, the Sustainable Water Resources Roundtable (SWRR) has brought together federal, state, corporate, non-profit and academic sectors to advance our understanding of the nation’s water resources and to develop tools for their sustainable management.